Rejection, It’s Not You…

When was the last time you felt rejected? Was it from a job that you really wanted? Or a relationship that didn’t work out? Or a friend or colleague that didn’t like your idea or suggestion? Or was it that someone just didn’t seem to be listening to you?

It is normal to have experienced rejection. We all have at some time in our life and for different reasons. Often it was because we wanted that ‘thing’ (job, idea, position on the team, relationship, or insert item here) that didn’t happen. Is it really rejection? It is our own rejection of who we are?

Is it not, that we need to learn to love ourselves more? and when we do, we are secure in who we are and you have all the approval inside you that you need. The only person that needs to like you and that needs to approve of you, is You! When you have that, when you have that love for yourself, not getting the ‘thing’ that you wanted will be less of an issue. It will no longer take over your life.

Why do people reject us, or our ideas? Upon closer inspection, it has more to do with the person that is doing the rejection rather than the rejectee (the person being rejected).

Quite often you will find that the reason behind the rejection is that what you are offering is not what is needed. It is not a rejection of you as a person, it’s not rejection of you in your entirety. It is rejection of what you are offering, that is the aspect that they do not want or need. Not you as a person.

It is easy to be confused with thinking, “they don’t want me, there is something that is wrong with me”. Upon closer inspection it is about what other people want or need. You are either able to provide for them or you aren’t. If you are not, then allow them the space to find it is what they need.  If you are, then it’s your decision if you want to share that aspect of yourself with them.

In summary, rejection is either what you are offering is not needed or what you are offering is not understood.  Either way, this does not tarnish who you are. In understanding the reason why your offering is not needed, it will help create some perspective on the situation.

Rejection is not about you. Its about offering something that isn’t wanted or needed.  If you think of the simple example of offering insurance to a person that has already has insurance, they are not rejecting you, they are rejecting the insurance as they do not need it.