Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the….
Although Snow White is considered a fairy tale, there may be some truth to the man in the mirror.
It was only after chatting to a friend that I realised the frustration I experienced due to the unequal distribution of domestic tasks within the household was a trigger for me.
The situation and more specifically, people’s behaviour within the situation, evoked an array of emotions within me. My wounds were being activated by the behaviour that was being reflected back to me. Only when pausing to acknowledge them, did I realise that my own unhealed wounds were being triggered.
This was far more than the simple distribution of tasks. It ran deeper than that.
Perhaps it wasn’t even about the domestic tasks at all.
People evoke animation within us – either anger, frustration, pain or annoyance or a more ‘positive’ emotional reaction such as joy or a warm fuzzy feeling inside.
The animation is a sign that something is being reflected back to you.
When looking for Wally in the ‘Where’s Wally’ series, you are able to spot him because you can recognise him. You know you are looking for his red-and-white-striped shirt, bobble hat, and glasses.
In the same way, when a person reflects something back at you, you are able to identify it because it is already within you. When you feel irritated by someone, it is very likely that the very thing that irritates you is related to a wound or challenge you are experiencing yourself.
It may not be exactly the same but if you are willing to pause and look in the mirror, you will discover the connection.
Next time you identify a strong emotion or animation within you, pause and ask:
What is this reflecting within me?
Why am I being triggered by this?
If you are open and brave enough, you may choose to not project your own feelings onto the mirror and just allow yourself to see what is happening within you.
Not all mirrors hang on walls. Some are living breathing beings, just like you.
What is being reflected back at you? I would love to hear from you about this or anything else. Contact me here.